Kids, Mommy Left Daddy
by Rianne Pond
Summary: "Kids," he played again with the hypothetical family they formed. Kaoru was noticeably not paying attention, a fact that would normally drive their host king insane. Alas, he didn't say a word, merely composed himself for the all too serious words to follow. "Mommy left Daddy." At this Hikaru barked a laugh. Tamaki snapped his head at him and hysterically yelled, "I'm serious!"


**Kids, Mommy left Daddy**

Tamaki paced past the couch once, leaving the entire club flustered and confused. He spun on one heel, quickly taking his hand to his chin to stroke thoughtfully. He then passed again. Hikaru took a sidelong glance at Haruhi, a frightened, worried glance. Tamaki paced past again, this time stopping at the middle of the couch, widening his stance until his feet were a shoulder-width apart and raising his hand methodically to his temple.

"Kids," he began, playing again with the hypothetical family they formed. Kaoru was noticeably not paying attention, a fact that would normally drive their host king insane. Alas, he didn't say a word, merely composed himself for the all too serious words to follow. "Mommy left Daddy."

At this Hikaru barked a laugh. Tamaki snapped his head at him and hysterically yelled, "I'm serious!" Everyone could see he was serious, or at least trying to be. Saying so wasn't really helping his case. He looked at Haruhi pleadingly.

"Wait, Kyoya left the Host Club?" asked Hikaru, now sensing the intensity in the situation. Tamaki didn't seem to react. At this lack of reaction Haruhi and the others looked around curiously.

"Drop the pretenses Boss," the twins said in unison. Tamaki shook his head, apparently overwrought with emotion due to the situation. Haruhi found herself on her feet before figuring out what she was going to say. Her tongue seemed to merely say the words, but before she knew it she too was giving input into the conversation.

"Take a deep breath everyone," she murmured, mostly talking about Honey, who was becoming blue in the face. "I'm sure we can manage without Kyoya," she mentioned, meaning no malice. The boys collectively let their mouths gape. Mori was the only member without a dumbfounded expression on his face. Noticing her fault Haruhi tried to save herself. "I mean if there is something wrong, which I'm sure there isn't."

"But what if there is?" Kaoru desperately added in.

"Kyo-chan is gone?" Honey wailed finally regaining the ability to speak. "But he didn't say goodbye!" Honey said, throwing his head into Mori's chest. Mori patted Honey's head softly to reassure the small boy. Tamaki at this point resided in the corner cultivating mushrooms helplessly.

"Well, we need to think," Haruhi stated the obvious; Hikaru gave her the are-you-kidding-me look before yanking his own hair out.

"No really? And they say you're an honors student," he replied snidely. She frowned at him.

"When did he go?" Kaoru asked, his voice uneasy, but his question helpful. Everyone stared at Tamaki, who now had brown fungi coming off his shoulders. After deciding that a forceful approach was useless all gazes turned to Haruhi, who wholeheartedly disagreed with the operation.

"Haruhi," Honey wailed.

"You know he won't listen to anyone else," Hikaru quipped. She sighed, shoulders dropping low as she realized that the club was right. She had to take one for the team.

As she brushed back her hair, Kaoru stared on curiously. Each of them seemed to be bursting with advice. Carefully ignoring the lot of them she began to cross the room. Hikaru caught her shoulder.

"Be sure to flirt," he encouraged; combing her bangs back from her eyes and pushing her forward only to be caught by Kaoru. Kaoru spun her around and quickly braded a side of her hair.

"Be sure to not use big words," he warned. Haruhi nodded and again began to walk only to be strong armed by Mori.

"Good luck," he stated. Haruhi felt like they were giving her last minute advice before sending her on a suicide mission. For the last time she began to walk away. When she least expected it Honey clung to her arm.

"Haru-chan, offer him cake!" he chirped. With the exception of Honey's advice, the club's encouraging words were helpful. With her confidence still slightly shaky she approached the depressed Tamaki.

"Senpai, when did Kyoya say he was going?" she asked, sitting beside him and putting a hand on his knee. He looked up at her and grinned. After checking to make sure her hand was really there and that he wasn't imagining it he looked almost pleased to answer.

"He told me in class. He said he was going home and that he wasn't going to Host Club," Tamaki replied. "Haruhi," he whispered, leaning closer to her. Haruhi giggled awkwardly and backed away.

"Uh, come with us Tamaki," she encouraged, taking his hand and dragging him to the door. "To Kyoya's house Boys!" she exclaimed while leaving the third music room. The entire walk to Tamaki's car he seemed to be trying to become increasingly close to Haruhi. She felt as though she had to beat him off with a mallet if she was ever going to get it through his thick skull that she was not interested. The fact that he was willing to have the school gossip about the possibility of him being gay was endearing nonetheless. Even though she didn't much care about anything she felt a warm appealing flutter in her heart when one of the boys did something _just_ for her.

"Are we sure this is a wise idea?" Kaoru asked, always the skeptic.

"Do we even know if he's home?" Hikaru added in, his face contorted in such worry that Haruhi hoped that it didn't stick that way. Honey squealed in fret.

"Or if he'll answer," Mori muttered, his voice strong as it was so seldom used. Haruhi was growing impatient with the boys. She pulled them to a halt and stared each in the eye, except for Honey, as he was so short.

"I won't hear any more of your complaining!" she demanded. "We're going to the Ootori house and we'll get our Kyoya back!" she encouraged, almost pumping her fist into the air.

"Mansion," Tamaki interrupted her visionary speech.

"What?" she asked, puzzled by his one word interjection.

"Ootori mansion," he explained, "Not house."

As one could imagine the car ride to the Ootori _mansion _was tense and silent. Haruhi spent the ride shoving Tamaki further away from her repeatedly. Honey began to hyperventilate multiple times. Hikaru and Kaoru bickered back and forth about whose fault it was that Kyoya had left. Mori merely sat silently awaiting their arrival.

"I knew nobody would answer!" Hikaru yelled in frustration as Mori gave him a pointed look. In all honesty, he was the one to say that, not Hikaru. Kaoru punched him in the shoulder.

"We're trapped out!" Honey yelled hysterically. "I'll kick down the door," he suggested. Tamaki, finally regaining his wits, stopped Honey quickly after he offered his Usa-chan kick.

"I have a key," he explained, stepping in front of the giant, expensive door to protect it from Honey's wrath. Everyone looked at him suspiciously. Why did Tamaki have a key to Kyoya's house? Everyone knew they were friends, but this was a bit odd under any standards.

Slowly, silently the club searched the house until they converged on Kyoya's door. There was a soft blue light under his door and the chatting of a TV left on inside. They'd found him. Nobody had even begun to ponder what they would say to him to convince him to stay, but in the standard Host Club fashion they pushed into the room without a plan.

The sound of their pounding feet woke Kyoya from his slumber. He sat up silently, almost as if he were the rising dead. Haruhi backed away slowly to the door frame, aware of what a severe mistake they'd made. Tamaki was less aware of their wrongdoing, for he remained there, staring at his friend expectantly.

"Why did you leave Kyo-chan?" Honey burst out, his sobs returning in full force. Kyoya wrapped a long finger around a tissue and blew his nose furiously before responding. Mori too was now beginning to realize their offense.

"What are you all doing here?" Kyoya snapped, his voice sounding harsh and nasally.

"You quit the Host Club and didn't think we'd come?" Hikaru asked, starting to realize how the entire situation didn't make much sense.

"I didn't quit, you idiots! I'm sick. Get out of my room!" he boomed. Everyone flinched under his stare and yell. The combination of the two was so unsettling it caused Tamaki to nearly trip over his own feet.

"We're sorry!" Kaoru tried to please.

"OUT!" he demanded once more, pointing to the door.

"Yes, Hypotensive Evil Lord," Tamaki whispered, walking out the door with his head down. He was aware of the berating he would get for his incorrect assumption.

Kyoya returned to school shortly after. Not a word was uttered about the event, but Haruhi's debt increased significantly and Kyoya was acting _more_ evil than usual. Needless to say Tamaki was blamed for the event.

* * *

**Just a silly Ouran oneshot! I hope you enjoyed :) Please REVIEW, FAVORITE and READ my other stories! Thank you everyone!**

**Additionally, I'm now writing requested works for anyone interested just PM me!**


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